AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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