His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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