yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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