David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
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