I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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