Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
