My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
