Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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