the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
