Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize