wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
