so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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