im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
