I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
