White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
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