I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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