You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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