Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
dude i'm inner monologue high
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
