I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
