My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
handjob tips. give me some.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
