Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Randomize
