problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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