You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Randomize
