Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
The Olympian is in my bed
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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