He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
