that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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