at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Randomize
