Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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