you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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