It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
