The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
