So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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