hell yes lets make some ravioli
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
