My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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