hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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