i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Randomize
