he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
