I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
