What did we do last night that was yellow?
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
