i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
