so explain again why im purple
no
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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