I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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