so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
I showed him my bush... on skype.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
