her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
