This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
