You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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