Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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