i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Randomize
