Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
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