Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
